Mr. Winkie Revisited

Although the news is aflame with assorted and sundry scandals and trials and topics worthy of discussion, things around here have been rather slow.  Mom seems impervious to the events happening around the country and in Washington and is content to play with her little electronic poker machine, dabble with an occasional crossword, or escape reality entirely with a good book.  So I’m replaying an oldie but a goodie.  I hope you enjoy it…

Mr. Winkie

My mother thinks two-piece bathing suits are immoral, a movie scene where two adults walk arm-in-arm into a bedroom and close the door will cause teens to have unprotected sex, and has to close two doors behind her before using her bathroom.  So, keeping this in mind, I suppose I should feel good about the fact that Mom has become so comfortable with Bill that she thinks of him as a son.  And why should I come to this conclusion?  Because the other morning when the phone rang, Mom decided to answer it.

I was in the garage doing laundry (yes all you Northerner’s, our washer and dryer is in the garage) and Bill was in the shower.  Mom plopped the phone on her walker seat, rolled down the hall, and flung open the bathroom door.  This wasn’t bad enough.  She then slid open the shower door and the following exchange occurred.

“You have a phone call” she stated manner-of-factly, trying to hand my soapy, soaking wet husband the phone.

“What the h***, can’t you see I’m in the shower…and NAKED!!” Bill shouted.

“Well, if you don’t want to talk to them, what should I say?” she asked still holding up the phone while the caller was free to hear the exchange.

“How about the truth?  I’m in the shower and I’ll call back?” Bill exclaimed while simultaneously wiping shampoo out of his eyes and desperately trying to hide Mr. Winkie.

“OK”, she answered, putting the phone to her ear. “He’s in the shower and will call you back,” she calmly informed the caller before pressing the disconnect button.

“Thanks for passing that along” Bill said sarcastically.  “Who was it?” he asked, sliding the shower door closed as Mom headed out of the bathroom.

“I don’t know” she called over her shoulder.  “I think I forgot to ask.  If it’s important, I guess they’ll call back.”

“Or put the whole thing on U-Tube!” Bill shouted after her as she made her way down the hall.

“Nope,” she yelled back.  “I don’t think that was their name.”



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